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Writer's pictureAlex Boney

The Weirdness of Going Back to Work



I started a new job last Friday. Today was my fifth day. I like it a lot, and I still can’t believe I got this lucky in this economy. I’m the Writer / Content Specialist for a small Kansas City retail company with a very niche focus that’s a lot of fun. (No, it’s not “adult toys,” though I guess that would probably be pretty fun, too.)

The work I’m doing is really rewarding. During the course of any given day, I’m writing catalogue descriptions, email copy, social media posts (not my own, so there’s a lot less cursing), and seasonal word lists. And then I edit all the stuff that’s getting designed. It’s a lot of responsibility all at once, but the fast pace and range of work keeps me constantly thinking and engaged. I love it.

I have to say, though—it is WEIRD to be back at work after five months away from an office. My position (and the positions of over 200 other employees) at my previous company was eliminated in mid-February. The pandemic shut everything else down a month later, so I was definitely going nowhere fast. Things weren’t financially dire (again, I was incredibly fortunate and I know that), so I took a few months to gather myself, recharge, and find some kind of focus. Then I interviewed for a job a few weeks ago, got offered the job the next day, and kind of thought to myself “Oh wow. I guess I’m doing this again.” It all happened super-fast, and I didn’t have time to think about what it really meant to go back to work—especially right now, in the middle of all the stuff we’re all dealing with in our world.

Last Friday I realized for the first time how removed I’d become from the rhythm of the workplace. I had gotten used to writing at home—in my boxer shorts and a t-shirt—wherever and whenever I felt like writing. I’d flop down on the bed or on the carpet beside the cat or on the couch in the basement and just type. If I got stuck, I’d get up and walk around...maybe go outside for a walk, rearrange some stuff on a shelf, or wander over to the neighbors’ pool. It was a shitty spring and summer in some ways (especially the lack of travel and limited contact with friends), but it was pretty great in other ways. I especially liked the freedom of working when and how I wanted.

But man, it really hit me last week how HARD it is to get fully dressed and sit upright at a desk for eight straight hours. Y’all, that is some unnatural shit. Beyond the masks and the worries about health and everything else (which is real), just sitting in an office for that long is something that doesn’t snap back automatically. For something that requires no actual muscles at all, it requires a lot of muscle memory to get back to the point where you can do what’s supposedly normal for grown humans to do. For folks who haven’t gone back to the office since March, prepare yourselves—you’re going to see just how much this kind of work environment takes some getting used to again.

Another thing I’ve realized is how much I communicate with my whole face. Our desks at work are spaced out far enough that we’re able to remove our face masks at our desks. Some do, some don’t. I guess it’s safe. But any time you get up to walk anywhere and move around the office, you have to put your mask back on. When I pass someone, I still automatically smile. And then I realize that the person totally didn’t see that smile. Basically, they saw me squint up my eyes a little bit and wrinkle the side of my eyes and maybe my shift my ears up a tad, and every bit of that is weird as hell if you don’t see a smile. I mean look at this crap:



That ain't right, folks. It’s unfortunate that I’m the new guy and I haven’t gotten used to interacting with and knowing these people with my whole head yet. I’m a pretty expressive guy in general, and I rely on my face to do a good chunk of the work when I interact with people—especially in an office setting, and especially with people I don’t know. And man, this is even less natural than having to wear clothes and sit upright for eight hours five days a week.

I know things have to be this way. I really do get it. I’m grateful to have a fun job where I get to fully use my abilities, and I’m grateful to work for a company that’s doing what it can to keep people safe in the office. But I very much look forward to the day when I can use my full face to communicate with people again.

And who knows? Maybe they’ll say we can come into the office and work in t-shirts and boxer shorts while lying on a yoga mat or lounging on a bean bag. (I mean it’s safe if I’m wearing a mask, right?) But I’m not holding my breath on that one.

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